Guest post by Roxanne Hack
It was permeating in my bones, seeping out of my skin, and manifesting itself in the form of severe stomach and chest pains and massive headaches. No matter how hard I tried to let go of the situation that was causing this anger, it held on like a bad smell in your kitchen that you just can’t identify no matter how many Tupperware containers you open and sniff.
It hadn’t started off as anger. In fact, I’d gone through much of the stages of loss already — denial, depression, bargaining (though not in that order). I knew the last stage would be acceptance, but it just wouldn’t come. I’d get out of one stage, and end up back in anger again.
Until Saturday, May 4.
I sat there in a gorgeous room at the Grand Californian in Anaheim, surrounded by like-minded women — most of whom I’d never met — and sobbed so loudly I actually startled myself.
Ms. Kimberly Rinaldi, the success coach whose workshops and private training sessions I’ve been attending for a few years now, was leading us through a timeline meditation at her women’s healing retreat. The technique addresses emotions — like anger — right from their start, and allows you to heal them all the way through your lifetime, up to and including the situation you’re currently struggling with. And it was exactly what I needed. Because when I went back on my timeline, I saw where this anger had stemmed from, and being able to say to my 4-year-old self that everything was going to be okay was enough. It was enough for me to release; I could finally let go.
This moment still gives me chills and loosens the tension in my shoulders. And it was only one moment out of many that have stayed with me since the healing retreat. From being able to hear other perspectives on similar circumstances to practicing favorite techniques, the retreat was exactly what I needed.
Since I’ve already attended so many of Kimberly’s training programs, I’d previously learned much of the lessons she taught at the retreat, but I compared it to a successful traffic school session. Sure, you know all the rules of the road because you’ve been driving for years, but there’s always a chance you’ll pick up something you missed the first time around. But the best part is that a refresher course means you’ve got those rules at the forefront of your mind for awhile now; after traffic school, you’re probably more apt to stay at the speed limit and keep your hands at ten-and-two on the wheel. After the women’s retreat, my meditation techniques have improved, and I am remembering to turn to EFT and toning before my stress levels get too high.
Whether learning or re-learning, connecting or reconnecting, the retreat was full of priceless moments, and more than worth the price of investment in myself. I can’t wait for the next one.
Roxanne Hack, 31, is a working mom. She lives in Orange County.